How life gets in the way

Life. It's busy. It never stops. I have spent this last year reading many blogs and knowing that mine was waiting for me to return. I just couldn't bring myself to sign on and write more. Who knows why. But this last year has been hard. Jason and I have already overcome so much that when more was heaped on the plate we just didn't understand how we could endure it. But we did; we endured another pregnancy, early birth, hospital visits, loss of jobs, insurance nightmares, sickness of loved ones.

God blessed us with another child, a girl we named Haley Jane. Christmas Eve 2009 I found myself 25.2 weeks pregnant and in the hospital. Once I passed 25 weeks I thought I was going to make it to 40 weeks, but alas, three days later into the hospital I went. I began feeling contractions and all through the Christmas Eve service I was trying to talk myself out of them. We got to my parents house, where we planned on spending the night with my sisters and their families, and I pulled my mom aside. Away Jason and I went to the hospital to be monitored. Jason, my mom and I spent 5 days in the hospital, and on one of those very uncomfortable Labor and Delivery beds might I add. The doctors tried 4 different medications to stop the contractions. The final one was a pill that tasted like barf. But to no avail did the drugs stop the contractions. On Tuesday Dec 29 the doctor decided to do a c-section because she was worried about a placental abruption. And sure enough, the placenta had ripped.

On Monday morning my doctor was on call and he came in to talk to us. He said some women in my circumstance can last weeks on bed rest. I did not find this comforting and finally cried for the first time. I prayed so hard that day and night for the courage and patience to last a few more weeks on bed rest. As every doctor didn't fail to tell me, "You don't want the baby to come this early." I think I knew this having gone through a premature birth before. I woke up Tuesday morning ready to be in bed for weeks, even two more months, to give our daughter more time to grow and mature. My breakfast of liquid came. (I was put on a liquid diet: broth, juice, tea, and Italian ice.) After drinking my breakfast, I gushed some blood. The doctor didn't like this, and neither did I.

I met the anesthesiologist, Dr. Reed, and was wheeled off to have my baby. Having a c-section is a bit surreal and I didn't like it at all. I was breathing very deeply so I wouldn't burst into tears because I knew what my life was going to be for the long months ahead; pumping, buying milk bags, visiting the hospital, washing for 3 minutes causing very dry hands, and a roller coaster of emotions as we watched Haley struggle to grow bigger and survive this harsh world too early. With Jason by my side, we heard Haley cry for the first time and even score an 8 on the apgar test. She was wrapped in saran wrap to help keep the moisture in as she was taken to the NICU. She was 13 inches and 1 lb 15 ozs, the same as Wyatt. Jason followed Haley and the doctors and I spent the next lonely hour in recovery watching the monitors beep through my heart rate, blood pressure, and breathing.

Jason and I were not sure we wanted another child after what we had gone through with Wyatt. But God knew better. I was much more excited through this pregnancy. It was fun to tell Wyatt he was not the big brother who needed to look after and protect his little sister.

I sit here and remember and know that this is not the last struggle and hurddle I will have to endure. I was made stronger through this and know God is glorified when I obey. So I will keep on obeying and He will keep on blessing me.